"It wasn't me, it was Simon Jones." And in that sentence Andrew 'Freddie' Flintoff lays to rest one of the greatest myths of the last decade; just who did take a pee in the garden of Number 10 Downing Street.
In his Second Innings tour, Freddie amused, entertained and
spoke from the heart in a two-hour show packed with anecdotes, cricketing
tales and musings on celebrity life alongside friend, co-host and podcast
partner Clyde Holcroft.
As he has frequently admitted, there are two sides to Flintoff. There's Freddie; the public persona, England finest who tore through the Aussies in 2005 and became the boozy uber-lad after helping his country lift the Ashes for the first time in 17 years.
And then there's Andrew, the now teetotal Preston kid, dad and husband who shies away from the limelight.
The bulk of this show is unmistakably Freddie. Laugh-out-loud stories from a life in cricket that he so clearly loved every minute of.
How he remembers nights out at Telford's Cascades nightclub while staying at Lilleshall's National Sports Centre. "I got beaten up there once."
How he falsely registered as an alcoholic on an England under-19 tour of Pakistan just so he could get 300 cans of beer for his team-mates in an otherwise completely dry country.
How he introduced himself to the Dalai Lama - 'Alright Dal, I'm Fred'.
How dancing naked to Johnny Cash helped unsettle Sachin Tendulkar and win a Test match against India.
And how Cherie Blair really does look a bit peculiar in real life; 'I thought it was just my telly that was out...'
Ah yes, that visit to Number 10 in 2005 following on from a night out to end all night outs after England recaptured the famous urn.
"I just remember going for a pint in the bar with my mates and the next thing I knew it was half past eight in the morning. I had breakfast with Mike Gatting, he had a whole farmyard on his plate. I had a cigar and a gin and tonic," Freddie says with a smile.
"Then we were at Downing Street." And how he snuck upstairs and found the Cabinet room and held his own imaginary Government meeting until he was turfed out by an unimpressed policeman.
But there is the odd glimpse of the real Andrew behind the fun Freddie persona.
Recalling the Ashes victory of 2009, Flintoff reveals how he was eager to soak up every last moment of his final series.
"I wanted to remember everything about Lord's," he recalls. "The sounds, smells, everything. If I close my eyes now I I'm almost back there," he tells his enraptured audience. And as they watch clips of his great triumphs, he merely watches his audience, rather than glorying in triumphs past. There's a real humility on show too.
And that's the thing about Freddie, you feel you know him. Indeed, blessed with his extraordinary talent, you feel that his life could have been yours too. An ordinary lad living a life less ordinary.
"I'm a rubbing rag from Preston," he says. "I can't help but wonder 'how did all this happen'."
And that's why while Pietersens may come and go, we will always love Freddie.